💙 Stuck In Fear

Did you mean to scare me? Cause I was…

I’m not sure you had my best interest at heart when you were talking to me.

BEING CONFIDENT

I have come to understand that for the most part, our conditioning impacts how we see the world.

Overtime and since I was a little girl I have been programmed to judge behaviors, situations, things, and people as “good”, “bad”, “better or worse”, “right or wrong”, “true or false”.

I have also been taught what would be safe or scary.

What I’ve noticed is that these judgments and beliefs that I’ve held close to me have started to have me self-sabotage.

WHY self-sabotage

Because at the end of the day my conditioning and programming is not coming from my core values or my own internal guidance system. They are instead arising from someone else’s perspective; someone else’s projection of what is possible.

I notice that cultural programming and other people’s dogma are a major source of FEAR and SUFFERING.

There came a time when I stopped achieving my goals and I stopped living the life I wanted. When this happened, I knew it was time to re-evaluate everything I had ever learned and start to re-learn new things to replace the old behavior. It was during this process of revamping my belief systems when I knew that my FEAR was not mine—and wasn’t real.

and also…

That was when I knew it was time for me to choose my thoughts and actions from my own belief system and align with my values—not anyone else’s. This also meant it was time for me to explore for myself to really KNOW what MY beliefs and values were.

During my exploration, I realized that judgments and assumptions about what is “good or bad”, “right or wrong”, “true or false”, “safe or scary”, are relative. They are based on one’s own subjective experiences.

I also started to see that when I wanted to venture off the beaten path or march to the beat of my own drum, most thought it was necessary to PROJECT their beliefs and fears on me. Now here is where it got tricky for me—distinguishing which beliefs were theirs and what was mine.

I will be honest: there were many times I got STUCK IN FEAR based on someone else’s thoughts, emotions, and beliefs about what I wanted to do. How unfair for them to project their shit onto me. And how immature was it for myself that I didn’t realize what was theirs and what was mine?

AND HOW SAD FOR IT TO HAVE STOPPED ME FROM GOING FOR MY DREAMS.

The best way I got out from under other people’s fear was to take a time out—receive quiet time for myself—and get in touch with my internal guidance system and really listen to the small, still voice inside; and get connected to my boundaries, beliefs, thoughts, dreams, and fears. Then I took action from that place. In some instances I needed to cut negative people out of my life.

I think of it like this: “You can be a support system for me and be a conversation for how to make it happen, or you can be a negative drag on my life and tell me all the reasons why it won’t happen and why I should be STUCK IN FEAR.”

I know in my heart that anything is possible—I know it intuitively, and I have evidence for it. I have evidence based on what other people in the world have accomplished and I have evidence based on what I have accomplished.

So, to be honest, my advice to move through FEAR and get UNSTUCK is:

  • Understand there is programming and conditioning coming at you from everywhere.

  • Get still and quiet, and listen to the voice inside.

  • Surround yourself with people who believe that anything is possible.

Dont put your fear on me!
— Sophie B.
 
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